Change is tough, but there are ways to make it easier
As I approach my half century, I have started to realise that I am not going to last forever. Why I ever thought that I might is beyond me, but these past months have dragged me into a reality check that I had been postponing for many years.
I have turned into Mr Frederickson from the film UP !
Fans of this wonderful film will be aware that Carl (Mr Frederickson) is a grumpy old man who has limited time for anyone or anything. Whilst I confess, I have not got that far into mirroring his character (Yet) I can see traits of this wonderful man in myself.
Even my Mushroom is sad!
Yesterday, as I was preparing another culinary masterpiece for the tribe, I noticed this little fella as I was washing my Mushrooms. ‘Why the long face?’ I said, to which I heard a soft reply ‘Because there isnt Mush-room in here!’ Sorry, I could’nt help myself, as I am on a journey of self improvement! Anyway, do not worry as no mushrooms were hurt during the writing of this post (We had eaten them yesterday in fact!)
Changing Perspectives
I am starting to recognise the signs of being overwhelmed, but instead of accepting that and doing nothing, I am changing the way I look at our incredibly busy life. Trying to see things as challenges that I am attempting rather than unmanageable problems that suck the life from me. First things first, I need to recognise that life is busy for us all, not unlike wealth, some of us have less zeros and other have more. I have managed to visualise why I may be feeling more overwhelmed and constricted than usual and I will try to explain here. I am sure we have all heard about the ‘Jar of Life’ story
Lets break down some of the challenges we have had this past year:
We have gone from having one foster child to having a sibling group of three
I have been through personal loss and grief.
We have also had to say goodbye to our Son who left to work in Canada.
Recently, we have welcomed builders into our home to extend it.
Personal relationship challenges
These are big changes in anyones life, with each one comes a miriad of related concerns and issues that need resolving. Puting it all down on the screen, allows me to see perspective and a potential solution. Whilst our lives have undoubtedly become busier, my tolerence and coping mechanisms have taken a hit with the death of my Mum. I recognise this and by being able to accept it I can work in helpful tools to build myself back up.
What can I do to aleviate the overwhelming sensations? (Back to the Jar of Life)
Re-focus. If I continue to think I can ‘fit it all in’ then I am delusional!
Prioritise my big rocks. If I can identify the most important things in my life, even if I only achieve those, then I can still say my jar will be full!
Realising that If I am overwhelmed, the solution is not to ‘do more’ it is to more of the right things!
There is always room for coffee. I need to take the time to see people, talk and offload more.
Being present
My Son is at an age where he can now see the cracks appearing in his old man. He has told me that he wants me to be around for as long as possible, both for his sake and his sister. I understand this. Which is why I have to do better and I intend to start that journey today. I am very proud of him, he is making a life for himself surrounded by kind and important people. I sometimes feel like I am letting him down, but the only person I am truly letting down is myself.
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Oh, by the way, talking of mushrooms did you know that can buy a Happy Mushroom Grow kit in certain Countries?
Take care